Ridiculous Reticulation by a Preposterous Giraffe on the Edge

When your melon is mushy and there are serpents in the darkness…

| February 20, 2011

Tonight my melon is mushy. I feel all spinny, like my life is gone out of control. It feels like I am surrounded by unfriendly people who are enraged at me, yet I am all alone. Nothing but a stuffed bear to talk to and all he does is stare right thorugh you. Simplistic really. […]

When to scratch, when to sniff, and when to wipe…

| February 16, 2011

You know there are things that are hard to learn for some people.  This is a very sensitive subject, but alas it is up to  the Giraffopia blog to shine the light on this.  DO NOT SCRATCH CERTAIN AREAS IN PUBLIC PEOPLE!  You would think that this little lesson would not be necessary, but it […]

Let’s Examine Big Fat Butts…

| February 16, 2011

You know that I have written about large butts before on the Giraffopia blog, and it is time I wrote again.  They are all around us, and they deserve recognition.  Huge butts are a distinct statement of ‘Who Cares!’ and ‘I love to eat’ which is broadcast around the world.  Careless?  No, I do not […]

Giraffes at the Bull Fights

| February 10, 2011

You know that people do not often invite Giraffes to the bull fights in Spain.  Do you know why?  Because we as Giraffes are tremendous in the ring.  We can whoop a bull in seconds.  It does not draw a crowd after the first time, because we stomp them so fast.  Thus, you never hear […]